Off Topic - Scotch, Scotch, Scotch and Whiskey

I want to take a moment to bask in the warm glory that is scotch.  My current collection contains:
Laphroaig 12
Caol Ila 12
The Arran 15th Anniversary
Ardbeg Supernova

And a special shout out to my Irish whiskey:
Redbreast 12
Redbreast 15
Bushmills Black Bush

So we're in the middle of a goddamned blizzard and I think I might just drink myself to the point where I'll have to go lay in the snow for a while.

What is a trademark?

As described in the Lanham Act Section 45, the body of law from which trademarks gain their protection, the term "trademark" includes any word, name, symbol, or device, or any combination thereof-

(1) used by a person, or

(2) which person has a bona fide intention to use in commerce and applies to register on the principal register established by this chapter,

to identify and distinguish the services of one person, including a unique service, from the services of others and to indicate the source of the services, even if that source is unknown.  Titles, character names, and other distinctive features of radio or television programs may be registered as service marks notwithstanding that they, or the programs, may advertise the goods of the sponsor.

Key phrases:  

-Word, name, symbol, device or any combination thereof

-USED

-to identify and distinguish.

What should you take from this?  The hallmark of trademark law is use.  The purpose of trademark law is the protection of consumers.  They want to know that the goods they are purchasing are the same goods that have earned a positive reputation and are thus known by the mark.

Distinctiveness

The four levels of distinctiveness (by strength):

1.  Generic:  Not protected.  The general name as to which something is called (identifies the product).  No amount of money or proof or secondary meaning can make it a valid trademark.
Examples of common words that were once trademarks:  escalator, yo-yo

2.  Descriptive:  Can be protected if secondary meaning is proved.  Conveys an immediate idea of the ingredients, qualities, or characteristics of the goods (describes the product).

3.  Suggestive:  Entitled to registration with little to no proof of secondary meaning.  Requires imagination, thought and perception to reach a conclusion as to the nature of the goods.  It still needs to be explained.
Examples:  Orange Crush for soft drink, Playboy for skin mag

4.  Arbitrary/Fanciful:  Always protected without any proof of secondary meaning (i.e. Kodak, Pepsi).  No obvious connection between product/service and the mark.  Arbitrary is taking a word in usage and applying to products which have no relation (i.e. Apple for computers).  Fanciful is creating a word which had never existed before (i.e. Kodak or Pepsi).